What if for a whole day you put yourself in someone else’s shoes before reacting? What impact would it have on the day for others? What impact would it even have on your attitude that day? Would you smile more? Would you laugh more? Would you allow others to be seen and heard?
So many times we decide to react to someone else’s actions instead of taking a moment to ask why that person may be reacting in that way. We don’t know what’s on that person’s plate. Maybe they have a sick parent or a sick child. Maybe they are so behind on their bills they don’t know how they will make it to the next pay day. Maybe they were just told their spouse doesn’t love them anymore. We don’t know what hurt someone is feeling from a recent event or even what hurt they are feeling from a past event. So what if we reminded ourselves there could be a reason that person is acting or responding that way. There is a very good possibility that there is a reason. Now yes, there are people who are always going to make you shake your head. We can’t get away from those people. Let’s face it the world would be boring if we didn’t have them.
My dad would always get annoyed when my mom and him would be driving somewhere and someone would pass him. He would always make a comment about how fast that person was driving and have a negative comment about their driving ability. My mom would always say you do not know if that person just got a call that a loved one is hurt or on their way to the hospital. My dad would just roll his eyes, but my mom was right. Yesterday I was complaining about how slow the driver in front of me was going while we were on the on ramp and getting ready to merge onto I-75. I said, “this is called the accelerating lane for a reason”. My 11 year old daughter said, “Mom, maybe it is a new driver in front of us. Put yourself in her shoes”. Sure enough as we passed the car there was a young driver behind the wheel.
Give the other person the benefit of the doubt before drawing a conclusion. We don’t know what they are facing. One more thing to leave you with; something I learned while doing some personal coaching. Remember the qualities we see in others (whether good or bad) are qualities we possess. If we didn’t possess the quality we wouldn’t be able to see it in others.